A Little Trip to Fenway

I woke up and all I had to do was make it through English class and I was off to Fenway.  But of course the day couldn’t be that easy.  We planned on going to a Red Sox game a week before and had all our plans squared away.  But the morning of, shit hit the fan.  The one person we were relying on the most, because he had a car, bailed out because he was “sick.”  Honestly, you must be on your deathbed if you’re going to bail out on going to Fenway Park.  Fenway is the most historic park of all time, built in 1912 (the same year that the Titanic sank) and is the oldest park still around today.  So if you have tickets and don’t go, you must be on crack (especially if you have never been before).  So now, we had 7 tickets and no ride.  We acted fast and called everyone we knew with a car asking if they wanted to go with us, or if they would rent us their car for the night.  No one was around.  We were shit out of luck and were stuck paying for a game that we would not be in attendance for.  Luckily we got a text within an hour of our original departure time saying we could borrow his car, but it only could fit 5.  One of our friends dropped out and this allowed us to go.

What kind of car did we just get offered, you ask?  A Prius: a mother fucking Toyota Prius. 

Allen Gamble: It’s my car. It’s a Prius. 
Terry Hoitz: I feel like we're literally driving around in a vagina.

(Scene from The Other Guys)

We all squished in and started our trip to the lovely city of Boston.  Boston is 93.24 miles from Amherst and about a two-hour drive.  The only thing that sucks driving anywhere out of town is getting to the damn Mass Pike.  You honestly drive for 35 minutes of back roads to get to the Pike, that was the worst of the journey.  During the two-hour ride, we bonded, talked about our significant others, had some boy talk, and of course sang.  We sang harder than any boy band out there.  Anything from “Call Me Maybe” to back woods country, if we knew the lyrics it was mandatory to sing them.

We made it into Fenway with an hour and a half to spare and 2 extra tickets.  Since we needed gas money and parking money we decided to sell the tickets.  We found buyers in no time and took in an extra $40 to use on our expenses.

Things to do when you go to Fenway:

1: Get there early and watch batting practice.

2: Walk around the stadium and check out everything.  Even though its old, they have been adding and improving it for the past decade.

3: BUY A FENWAY FRANK.  If you don’t like hot dogs, then you are un-American.  Fenway Franks are the most delicious food.

4: Go to right field and see the Ted Williams Seat.  This marks the spot of the furthest recorded home run hit at Fenway.

5: Enjoy the game.

6: Have the peanut hawker toss you a bag.  If he sees your hand up and you’re 15 rows away, he will throw them to you.  These guys have that job for a reason.

7: Sing ‘take me out to the ballgame’ during the 7^th inning stretch.

8: Sing ‘Sweet Caroline’ during the middle of the 8^th inning.

9: Partake in the wave!  You may think it is childish, but it may be one of the greatest perks of being at the game.

10: Take photos, these are memories that you will never forget and you will want some mementos to keep.

I can’t tell you how many games I have been to, but I can tell you that every game I attend someone gets engaged.  It is as if Fenway pulls out the romantic side in every guy.  I can’t imagine that the girl enjoys this though.  First of all, she is put up on the jumbo-tron in front of 35,000 people; next she pretty much has to say yes, unless she wants to face embarrassment, and finally who wants to get engaged at a baseball game?  No prince charming can ever woo a lady at the game, it is like asking a your girl friend to marry you at a fucking farm.  To all the Romeos out there, don’t propose to your girlfriend at the game, drink a beer and have a frank.

So this particular game I went to on April 17 against the Texas Rangers was an absolute blowout.  When I say blowout, I mean it.  I’m talking about a good old backyard beat down.  The final score was 18-3, and the Red Sox didn’t win.  But that was okay by me.  The fact that I was at the game with my friends made it okay.  A good thing about blowouts is everyone leaves early.  So after it got out of hand, we got seat upgrades.  Our $18 seats turned into $200+ for an hour or so.  We were field level; two rows back watching the last inning of the game.  Nothing wrong with that, if you’re going to spend money on tickets, why not gets the full value out of them.  Overall the Sox got spanked, but the experience was great.

Way To Ruin The Game Boomer

Of course Boomer can dunk, you're not gonna see the Bowdoin polar bear shattering that backboard.  I'm just sayin.

Mile High Arthritis

I was looking at yesterday’s MLB transactions and noticed that Jamie Moyer had been signed to a minor league contract by the Rockies.  Seeing his name there got me thinking about his career compared to other pitchers, specifically his chances of making the Hall of Fame.  Dude’s been pitching forever and has a few pretty impressive stats, realistically looking at any one of his seasons he is by no means a Hall of Famer but at what point does the compilation of stats mean more than real dominance? 

In general I’m at odds with how pretty much everything in baseball’s awarding system works.  Too many inconsistencies to really know what to expect, MVP and Hall of Fame voting are the worst.  The part about both of them that really gets to me are the inconsistencies, Verlander winning the MVP was understandable if we didn’t already have an award for the best pitcher.  So many pitchers have had comparable seasons to Verlander and been denied the MVP.  If I could have my way there’d be a Cy Young award, a best hitter award (Babe Ruth award?) and an optional superlative award.  The superlative award would be for outstanding an performer and would require a certain percentage of votes to be awarded. 

The Hall of Fame voting mostly sucks because of how long it took for Jim Rice to get in, really embarrassing for them.

Half of me thinks that if Jamie Moyer gets into the hall of fame it would be kind of a life-time achievement award.  Some of his stats (wins, Ks) are Hall of Fame for sure, but his ERA is crazy high.  Nobody in the HOF is there anyone with a 4+ ERA (closest is Red Ruffing, 3.80) but it makes me wonder what the actually importance of stats are in the voting process.  Legitimately rewarding players for not being associated with steroids during the steroid era is stupid, dudes should be held even tighter to their stats being as they are really the performance they naturally gave. 

Calling it now…Moyer will make it into the Hall of Fame in his first year of eligibility……2030

Dry blog but stuff like this is always on my mind and I don't care what you think

P.S. I'm with the Jew on this one, lets use some common sense

P.P.S.  I'm here to blog, not write a research paper, I'll use all the bad grammar I want

P.S.S.S. MY NAME IS JAMES AND I LOVE COCK IN AND AROUND MY MOUTH...
the ruler of this blog is absolute shit. 

Geese Blackout in Protest of SOPA... Oh Wait

So yesterday, many high profile websites such as wikipedia and reddit blacked out  their websites in protest of the SOPA bill that is being reviewed by Congress. Now while I admittedly don't know much about SOPA, what I do know is that a high profile website such as Geese Chatter should have stood tall with our internet brothers and deprived our readers of fresh material for 24 hours. I understand that many people would be devastated across the world not to read the fresh insight we provide for a day, but I think (more like thought) we owed it to the other high profile websites to show solidarity against internet censorship. So it is safe to say that I was disappointed when I saw that AMarko posted just after noon today. And then PJ (the sheep of the flock) followed his lead and posted just 6 hours later. Our blackout lasted just about half the time it should have and ended again halfway to its conclusion. (Insert premature ejaculation joke here.) I am disappointed in the lack of discipline shown by the Geese today, and despite the anticipation and need of millions to hear the Chatter on the daily, we will stand with our brothers during future internet protests- it is our duty as a high profile, high-traffic website.

Welcoming My Boy James

Just wanted to give a quick welcome to my buddy James a.k.a. Jimmy/Jimmer/J-Money from Ohio University.  He's basically the biggest bro ever and we have a nice little bromance going with 80 pictures together on Facebook, so haters be jealous.  James has already contributed nicely with two posts, and I expect that he will add a little bit of a different perspective, being that he's not living with the flock.  Welcome to the V-Formation.  #FlockNation.

Ayo Marko! Don't talk about spelling and grammar errors if you're going to have one in the title of your post... Just sayin'.

He Who Calls Himself "James".

I just read your blog and a piece of me almost clicked the delete button.  I almost threw up in my mouth.  First of all, it was absolutely disgusting and poorly written.  Did you even put any thought into it?  Next I don't even recall seeing one word capitalized.  Finally, you bring such a bad name to us.  Here at Geese Chatter, we actually have some self respect and honor, so clean up your writing.  And if you were wondering,  I do have the authority to delete anything I don't like.  Here are some guidelines to some future posts.

1.  Always capitalize the first word in a sentence.  I am not sure if you are in college or in preschool, because your grammer sucks.  Is it that hard to push the shift button to capitalize one letter? Or if you're that lazy, go into a Word Doc. and type it all out, then push 'Spell Check'.

2.  Make sure you spell out every single word.  What I mean by this is.  Do not use 'u' instead of 'you'.  We do not want any Text Message spelling.

3.  Overall, I do not care what you blog about.  I do not care who you blog about.  Just keep it neat, keep it organized, and above all, keep it classy.  Other then that, welcome to the Flock.

The New Face Of The Red Sox

Great pick up by the sox yesterday, Padilla will no doubt be an invaluable part of the sox world series season this year....who wouldnt want a guy like Padilla?  Mid 40's in age, mid 4 ERA and the do anything to win attitude of a pitcher that gave up on the 02' All Star Game.  Gotta like the direction the sox are going in, but to be honest their other pick up yesterday, franklin morales is a good move god knows we need relief pitching.

Hope im not gonna be the only one posting, I expect great things from everyone associated with geese in any shape or form

P.S.  resigning salty was a must but I've gotta say Lavarnway is the future. Varitek has one more year then he should do us all a favor and retire, saying that hes my favorite player of all time.